I watched the squirrel balancing on the branch on the tree outside my living room window. The squirrel , who we will call Maxie, wasn’t concerned about balance, who is president or where his next nut will come from. Maxie had no concern that i was watching . Maxie appeared not to be impacted by the cares of this world. Maxie was just being and doing his squirrel thing.
In our present America, many individuals are living with cares. Cares of being separated from their families. Care of being stopped by the police. Cares of prejudice. Cares of rejection. Cares of being alone. Cares of not being believed. You fit in your care…..
What if we could live with equanimity. The English word equanimity refers to a state of being calm and balanced, especially in the midst of difficulty. I am not proposing that we turn the other cheek when it come to our cares. I am suggesting that we offer equanimity instead of fear or anxiety. Remaining calm in the care thereby cultivating a balance-an inner stability despite surrounded by turmoil. Teaching ourselves not to be lead by our emotions and or biases. More so, that we notice what we feel without allowing them to drive or behaviors. Once we reach the state of equanimity we can be generous to ourselves and others.
What would that generosity look like? The generosity I speak of is not of a monetary value. The generosity I reference is one in which we give with compassion, conviction, attentively, and without negatively affecting others. We start by offering ourselves generosity of self compassion.
“You can search the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself and that person is not to be found anywhere. You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” Buddha
After we offer ourselves generosity we can offer others generosity. I may not agree with “their” perspective; Yet, I can let you be and have your space.
I share from a personal viewpoint. I have family members that I feel are judgmental and hurtful. Despite their misunderstand of my equanimity for apathy or coldness I know what I cultivating. I am choosing to life a live of generosity. They choose not to see because of their own imbalance. Equanimity is a process and others are welcome to join me on the journey or not. Thanks Maxie for lavishing my morning with equanimity.
Yesterday is like a dream. Yesterday cannot be duplicated nor reconstructed. Yesterday is a thought, a memory, a distant today.
Today has been like no other. Cannot be duplicated. Cannot be reconstructed as today has been filled with intentional and non intentional moments. All the days of our lives till now has been constructed to to unfold today
Tomorrow is too early to tell what the day shall behold. As much as we would like to foresee how the day will unfold or what will come our way we must wait.
Life happens in the here and now and that is where the wealth of happiness is contained.. Living in the past keeps us bound to memories void of life in the present. Living for the future keeps us un-rooted to the present. Living in the present allows us to be emotionally aware, engaging, and live with meaning.
Just this past weekend my daughter was married. The morning of the wedding my thoughts of yesterday’s flooded my mind. Yesterday when she was born. Yesterday when she first walked. Yesterday when she was a gymnast. Yesterday when she was commissioned as an Army Officer. My thoughts shifted to the future which made me anxious because so many scenarios are possible.
The wedding day afternoon I beheld the beauty of my daughter standing in her wedding dress. Yesterday didn’t matter, the future was not important. All that mattered was the present moments of joy, tears, smiles, and celebration. There will be pictures of the event; yet, nothing can take the place of the feeling at that particular juncture of time.
Life is made of moments; moments are made for happiness. If we wait until happiness finds us we shall be waylaid by happenstance. Reality dictates that not all moments are happy filled; yet, more often than not happiness outweighs challenges of life.
This moment can not be duplicated nor reconstructed. This moment is to be cherished. All the days of our lives have brought us to this moment…