The Art of Ending

The Art of Ending. Even as I type the word, end, there’s a feeling inside of me that cringes. Endings in my life have been painful and eventful. The divorce, the job, the relationship, the move, or the conversation. The pain unbeknownst to the bystander fills my being with an  ache that permeates my  entire being.  Was I right? Was I wrong? Does it really matter for it’s the end. I’m reminded of the Willie Colon and Hector Lavoe song: “Todo Tiene Su Final ,” Everything has an ending.

Just maybe though, faith in God would have me believe, that this supreme being  can make beauty out of ashes.  The end doesn’t have to be so painstaking. It would  be uncomfortable but not overwhelming as the promise of hope would usurp the sense of dismay.  

Perhaps not faith; Maybe Existentialism can give a weighted perspective on  Ends.  We are after all beings with freedom and capacity to make choices. The choice on how view the end.  We get to define our own meaning in life. Our meaning need not be dictated by others opinion or labels someone gave us like Bipolar (They actually don’t know what the word really means).  Much like Eye movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR) we get to rewrite the narrative and give it meaning to  our existence.

Sartre’s challenge is to accept responsibility for our choices while embracing the inconceivable unknown. At times our choice is to end and other times ends are thrusted in our face. Regardless, with an end comes an unknown of a new beginning.  


“I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.”

Woody Allen

New Beginning

"The manner in which we live and what we become are the result of our choices"  Gerald Corey

What would life be like if we started that business, that class, or let go of that old, stagnant relationship? One must decide what one's goals are and chase after them without hesitation. One has to make decisions, choosing at times to alter their lives in order to reach their desires which requires creativity.  When inquisitiveness and creativity fail us, embracing unfamiliar circumstances and opportunities becomes overwhelming and we often freeze.  In this case our decision making becomes like stale bread, worse even; stale bread can be made into bread crumbs; frozen decision making becomes more like stagnant water, breeding mosquitos or parasites! Without imagination as guidance, life becomes an exhausting cycle of "I don't know" or "I don't care." One becomes dull with no new ideas with little to talk about or share. Group thinking sets in, everyone agrees with each other and people lose their individuality, creating a  homogeneous society. Curiosity opens our minds to possibilities and the willingness to take a chance(s) on ourselves. With curiosity, one's ideas may prove untrue, though  failure should not be feared  because it is not fatal, only a growth opportunity. Curiosity is said to activate the dopamine in our brains, which is the happy chemical. Who wouldn't like to be a little happier? In addition to boosting happiness, curiosity helps us  learn. Why? Because it adds value to what we are learning and  signals our hippocampus, the area in our brain associated with memory. I challenge us all to become curious about one thing today and see if we don't feel just a little more invigorated and sharper  then we have in awhile.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery each day.

—"Old Man's Advice to Youth: 'Never Lose a Holy Curiosity.'" LIFE Magazine (2 May 1955) p. 64”
Albert Einstein